Written by Janice LaFountaine, LMFT on .

Three-panel guide to navigating narcissistic patterns beyond the label: narcissism as a broad spectrum from grandiose to vulnerable to communal, prioritizing impact over diagnosis when setting boundaries, and shifting the lens from their pathology to your own self-recovery.

Unpacking pop psychology's obsession with the term—and what's actually happening clinically

Open any social media app and scroll for a few minutes. You'll encounter content about narcissists: how to spot them, how to leave them, how to heal from them. The term has become cultural shorthand for anyone who's selfish, manipulative, or emotionally unavailable. Your difficult ex? Narcissist. Your controlling parent? Narcissist. Your self-absorbed coworker? Definitely a narcissist.

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Written by Janice LaFountaine, LMFT on .

Three-section anatomy of a trauma bond: the structural blueprint of intermittent reinforcement and power imbalance, the biological grip of neurochemical addiction and survival responses, and the path to reclaiming self through safety-first trauma recovery.

Is It Really Trauma Bonding?

You see it everywhere now — social media posts, podcast discussions, conversations with friends. Someone had a difficult breakup, and suddenly: "I was trauma bonded." A coworker stays in an unfulfilling job: "Must be trauma bonding." A friend tolerates rude behavior from family: "That's trauma bonding, right?" The term has become cultural shorthand for "I stayed when I should have left." And while the widespread recognition represents real progress, something valuable — and potentially life-saving — gets lost when a clinical term becomes a catch-all for every painful relationship.

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Written by Janice LaFountaine, LMFT on .

 <h3>&nbsp;<img src="images/reclaiming-your-financial-soul-pillars.webp" alt="reclaiming your financial soul - rebuilding financial autonomy after coercive control through naming the truth, creating safe space, titrating exposure, facing the numbers, and trusting your judgment

Reclaiming Your Financial Soul: Rebuilding Autonomy After Coercive Control

Financial abuse is a pattern of coercive behavior in which one person uses money, credit, or economic resources to control, exploit, or trap another person in a relationship. According to the National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV), financial abuse occurs in approximately 99% of domestic violence cases. Judith Herman, in her foundational work Trauma and Recovery, identifies the restoration of autonomy—including financial autonomy—as a core task of the second stage of trauma recovery.

You did not break. You adapted.

Every symptom you carry—the hesitation before opening a bank statement, the panic when a bill arrives, the deep wells of shame about money—is evidence of a nervous system that learned to survive systematic control. But surviving is not the same as living. And your journey toward financial sovereignty is not about becoming "smarter with money." It is a sacred act of trauma recovery.

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Written by Janice LaFountaine, LMFT on .

the financial coercion blueprint

How Money Becomes a Weapon of Control

And how to recognize the patterns that keep survivors trapped

The Pattern Nobody Talks About

She had two master's degrees. A successful career before the marriage. She could negotiate million-dollar contracts at work—but couldn't explain why she needed $40 for groceries without a interrogation.

He earned six figures. Managed a team of 50 people. Made complex strategic decisions daily—but his wife had passwords to all his accounts and he had to ask permission to buy lunch.

This is financial coercion. And it's one of the most devastating—and least understood—forms of control in abusive relationships.

 

Most people recognize the visible markers of abuse: raised voices, physical intimidation, isolation from friends. But financial coercion operates in the shadows, creating invisible chains that are just as binding—and often harder to escape—than physical violence.

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Written by Janice LaFountaine, LMFT on .

breaking the vicious fight cycle

The Real Reason Couples Fight About Nothing—And Everything

Why you and your partner keep having the same fight—and what attachment science tells us about breaking free

 

You've had this fight before. Maybe a hundred times.

Your partner criticizes you for working late again, and you defend yourself by pointing out everything on your plate. Or you ask why they never want to talk anymore, and they retreat further into silence. The topic changes—and understanding your attachment style can help explain why—but the topic changes—dishes, money, parenting, sex—but the dance stays the same. One of you reaches (often with an edge), the other retreats. Repeat until exhausted. (Understanding your attachment style helps explain why.)

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